Oh go on then, might as well do the last one. You know the drill.
Pre-gig pub? Let's say Vocation. It's good, quite big and you have to walk by it to get to the Trades from the railway station, unless you go along the canal.
Offers of lifts? This might come in handy as last trains to Leeds and Manchester are 2305 and 2310 - not very helpful! Fingers crossed it's an early finish.
Spare beds? Mine's taken, sorry. Could fix up the airbed and sleeping bags if you're desperate.
Cheap digs? Not in Hebden Bridge, matey.
Spare tickets? Because it's sold out, of course.
Owt else kids?